Watching Your Husband Screw Up in a Healthy Way

That moment that you smile encouragingly at your husband over your typical standing-in-the-kitchen dinner while he tells you his latest plan and all the while you are thinking, “Why does he always go down these rabbit holes?” You want to argue and yell and tell him he’s crazy, he’s wrong and he should just get on board and do things your way-slash-the right way.


Whatever it is he’s talking about, be it buying a “vintage” boat, marketing gourmet codfish, or investing in his buddy’s start-up business, there is something oddly satisfying about knowing about the impending doom hovering over your beloved’s head like so much cloud cover.


You know what the future holds for his now bright and excited demeanor, but you also know that the coming failure – because you can’t call it anything else – is of more value than a won argument.


In marriage we are all (both) entitled to our entrepreneurial endeavors. Some prefer blogging and get mocked, others prefer starting music festivals from scratch and get criticized. Either way, on the off-chance that this insane plan actually works, you have what I like to call “something to write about.”


When in the 9-cases-out-of-10 chance it fails miserably, I guess you could also write about it, but what you really have is an invaluable experience that caused a hundred years of growth in the blink of an eye.


And what wife doesn’t long for a more mature, weathered and well-rounded husband? These experiences will turn him into the older, wiser, quieter man at the back of the room telling some other youngster not to dive into something so ridiculous as trying to reinvent the hula-hoop.


So, the next time your husband bursts through your kitchen door yammering on about some idiotic opportunity, feel free to let him know your opinion, tell him the reasons it might fail, and end with a smile and say “but you do what you think is right, Honey.”


Warning and a disclaimer: 9 times out of 10 he’ll take that as your enthusiastic blessing and run with it.


And please, for the sake of all things sacred, mature and wise, refrain from laughing at him and taunting “I told you so” when it is all over. Instead, be awesome, supportive and then gently and firmly suggest your way-slash-the right way instead.





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